I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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