Those balls look pretty dangerous.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
