Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
