Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
