The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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