so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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