Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Randomize