Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
you win again, gameday.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
