this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
My bed is full of blood and feathers
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
