dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
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