That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
