Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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