just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
