Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
