So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Will exercising make me less horny?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
