Don't make out with my wife yet
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
