New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
