theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Do vagina's smell?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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