Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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