I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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