I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
