Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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