I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
