our cab driver is having phone sex.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
