He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
