Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
