Non-Jews are for practice
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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