Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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