Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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