I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
