...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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