so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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