that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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