is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
