He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize