I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
