Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
