people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
