i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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