Buhtt sex?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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