dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
