Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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