I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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