i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
