So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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