i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
