I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
