Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
