The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
that is very illegal...i love you.
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