I didn't shave. On purpose
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
she peed on how many people?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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